1 Attend a speed-dating event with a "ferocious python", and don't cry (8 votes) 72.7%
2 Limit the number of dead spiders entereing your selfish cod (2 votes) 18.2%
3 Ravage a moose while whistling the theme tune to Knight Rider. (1 vote) 9.1%
#32 put a lemon in daves vag and tell everyone he's a sour puss (Suggested by marisa jelas)
#31 Capture the drunken yodelling imp of Bavaria using a yoyo and a semi-clad babe (Suggested by Van der Brew)
#30 make an iPhone from your mum's glass eye and the red Batphone from "Batman" (Suggested by Mad_Mat)
#29 Kick Chuck Norris in the balls as hard as you can, then kiss his beardy chin. (Suggested by Alastair)
#28 Guest star in "CSI" as Wilson Q.Picklewhip, a wealthy yet mysterious businessman (Suggested by Mat)
#27 Explain erotic fiction to The Pope, without using the letter "B" (Suggested by Mat)
#26 Appear in a scene of Heroes wearing muffin shoes, fighting peter. (Suggested by Kyri)
#25 Explain the meaning of mathamatistics. (Suggested by Davo)
#24 Sit quietly (Suggested by DaveTheKnave)
#23 Take your girlfriend out for a nice meal for once, you cheap bastard. (Suggested by Stephanie)
#22 shave a monkey, and then dress him up as a gay Captain Hook (Suggested by mat)
#21 Trick Steve Buscemi into marrying Pete, the world's happiest Xenomorph. (Suggested by Ben)
#20 Switch the Olympic flame with Ted Danson and see if anyone notices. (Suggested by Gareth)
#19 Prove the existence of God using a paperclip and an overeaten leg of lamb. (Suggested by Gareth)
#18 Explain to Tibet that Clive is a silverback gorilla who drives a Bedford Rascal (Suggested by Hampy McHamper)
#17 Create a device to help Bear insert soft cheese into a leopard. (Suggested by Marcus Corner)
#16 Beat Spock senseless with a replica of Kirk's girdle (Suggested by GibbonMaster)
#15 Perforate an irritable mammoth using a cheese flannel and a lead trilby (Suggested by Van der Brew)
#14 Juggle a camel and a walrus whilst waxing lyrical about the price of tofu... (Suggested by Jon)
#13 Build a pyramid out of irregular cherry tomatoes while wearing a blue suit (Suggested by Bimma)
#12 Slap a gorilla and wait to see what he does. (Suggested by Dark Ramjet)
#11 Preach to a plate of angry baked beans about the dangers of farting (Suggested by Daf)
#10 Nourish a lamb back to health after swelling it with birch granulas (Suggested by Hagsteel)
#9 effect a regime change in the Shetlands, using special bovine powers (Suggested by rhid)
#8 Glue your elbows together, whilst wearing a "butt hat" (Suggested by MadMat)
#7 Worry a small ham with a deep glove made of elligeble ants from the alps (Suggested by Jonas)
#6 Beat up Dave The Knave with a bundle of logic, telling him he's boring me. (Suggested by Hideo Yazama)
#5 Stumble across all possible versions of yourself, then fight them. (Suggested by Ben)
#4 Disguise yourself as a gypsy who sells washed up actors (Suggested by Daf)
#3 Place a cask of mouse-wine into a holding cell for dripping waiters (Suggested by DaveTheKnave)
#2 Arrive on the LOST island and save everyone from a rabid Dharma dolphin. (Suggested by Steff)
#1 Move a disco with a forseeable gate made of angry crows (Suggested by Jonas)